Douglas Carswell

Douglas Carswell
Name	John Douglas Wilson Carswell (born 3 May, 1971)
Politics
Party	Independent (2017-2017) Ukip (2014–2017) Conservative (1990–2014)
Constituency	Clacton (2010-present} Harwich (2005-2010)
Likes	Transparency, localism, democracy, Hello Kitty World
Dislikes	The European Union, government, red tape, the NHS, Newtonian physics
Friends	?
Enemies	David Cameron, Michael Martin
Relationships
Partners	Clementine Bailey
Children	Kitty (2000)
Personal Attributes
Nationality	English
Religion	Church of England
Sexuality	Straight
Height	6'4"
Eye Colour	Grey
Handedness	Right
Accent	Received Pronunciation

A rebel with an unclear cause.~ Fraser Nelson

In the summer of 2014 former Tory MP Douglas Carswell made history by defecting to Ukip, winning a by-election in his Clacton constituency to become the party's first elected MP. Since he is pro-immigration and anti-racist, this choice was and remains somewhat baffling, but it launched Douglas and his asymmetrical mouth to the forefront of the national news agenda.

Life and Career

Early Life

Douglas was born in Uganda to two doctors. His father diagnosed the first cases of HIV in Uganda and was the inspiration for the protagonist of The Last King of Scotland, a novel about an idealist young Scottish doctor who becomes the personal physician of Idi Amin. Acting perhaps on an understandable desire to get their kid the fuck out of 1970s Uganda, Douglas's parents sent him away to boarding school, first to St. Andrew's School in Turi, Kenya and then to Charterhouse in England. Douglas went on to attend the University of East Anglia and earned a Master's in British imperial History from King's College London.

Pre-political Career

After leaving university Douglas worked for an Italian television company, a career that seems to have engendered in him a passionate hatred for the EU, and then for Invesco, an investment firm which started turning a profit again immediately after Carswell left in 2005. (We're sure there was no connection.)

Early Political Career

Ah, those long ago days when Douglas had a blue rosette. And hair.

In 2001 Carswell stood in Sedgefield against Tony Blair and outperformed the national swing. Sadly for Gordon Brown he failed to overturn Tony's 65% majority, so he went back to Invesco for another four years. During the 2005 campaign he had a minor job in the Conservative Party's policy unit, reporting to David Cameron.

Parliamentary Career

Tory Backbencher

Douglas has long been an agitator for parliamentary reform. He led the campaign to bring down Speaker Michael Martin over the expenses scandal, the first such campaign against a Speaker in over 300 years. Other MPs warned Douglas it would end his career, but in the event it ended Martin's.

Defection

Douglas joins the "People's Army"

In August 2014 Douglas shocked Westminster by defecting to Ukip. This was an interesting choice in light of the smackdown he'd administered to his fellow Tory Euro-trolls back in January:

I’m a little bit dismayed that sometimes the tactics adopted by people who feel as strongly about Europe as I do undermine the strategy... If you look at the fact Cameron has promised an in-out referendum, that’s an extraordinary commitment and so much of what we’ve done since has obscured that fact. I just think we’re doing this wrong.

Apparently the right way to do it is to switch parties.

Re-Election

I voted Ukip. The Tory MP has done nothing for years.~ A Clacton resident explaining her vote in the by-election

Douglas did the honourable thing and resigned his seat so his constituents could have the choice between reelecting him under his new Ukip banner or electing a new Tory MP instead. In the ensuing by-election he won a thumping victory, getting 59.7% and a majority of more than 10,000 votes. His subsequent performance in the general election suggests much of this may have been a protest vote.

Ukip's Sole MP

There is something admirable about a party with one MP staging a backbench rebellion.~ Anonymous

Despite Ukip's generally poor performance in the 2015 election, Douglas managed to cling on in Clacton and was returned as their sole MP, although his majority was cut by almost 9,000 votes. He promptly staged a backbench rebellion against his new party by refusing to take all of the £650,000 of Short Money Ukip was entitled to and suggesting that Nigel Farage, having promised to resign, should actually bloody well resign.

Defection

Once Theresa May triggered Article 50, Carswell saw no reason to remain a UKIP MP and left the party to be an Independent MP. Nigel Farage wasn't very happy with this, nor the fact that for this defection, Carswell saw no reason to hold a by-election and re-establish his personal mandate for ~reasons~.

Resignation

Theresa May then triggered a snap general election. Carswell decided not to stand for election, bringing his career to an end in 2017.

Ideology

Douglas is a radical free-market libertarian, a stance which sits oddly in authoritarian, xenophobic Ukip.

Appearance

Douglas has a strikingly asymmetrical mouth. Seriously. It's remarkable.

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The Hello Kippy Incident

In February 2015 Douglas sent this tweet from his phone. He attributed it to his five-year-old. Suuuuure, Douglas, we believe you.

Tidegate

Douglas is sure that the sun, and not the moon, is the source of the Earth's tides.

Very sure.

People in this country have had enough of experts.