William Hague
| William Hague | |
|---|---|
|
| |
| Name | William Jefferson Hague (born 26 March, 1961) |
| Nicknames | Wllm (fandom) |
| Politics | |
| Party | Conservative |
| Constituency | Richmond (1989-2015) |
| Positions | • Leader of the House (2014-2015) • Foreign Secretary (2010-2014) • Leader of the Opposition (1997-2001) • Secretary of State for Wales (1995-1997) |
| Likes | Yorkshire |
| Dislikes | ? |
| Friends | ? |
| Enemies | ? |
| Relationships | |
| Partners | Ffion Jenkins (1997–present) |
| Personal Attributes | |
| Nationality | English |
| Religion | Church of England |
| Sexuality | Straight |
| Height | 5' 10" |
| Eye Colour | Slate blue |
| Handedness | Right |
| Accent | Yorkshire |
The only northern powerhouse the Tories have ever had.~ Angela Eagle
William Hague first burst onto the political scene at the tender age of sixteen, when he gave a speech at the 1977 Conservative Conference. He went on to become an MP and Welsh Secretary in the Major government. After the Tories' landslide defeat in 1997 Hague was elected Leader of the Conservative Party, but he failed to make any headway in the next election. He reinvented himself as a highly successful after-dinner speaker, and became Foreign Secretary and then Leader of the House in the Coalition. William is popular in fandom for his competence and wit at the dispatch box and for his sexy, sexy voice.
Life and Career[edit | edit source]
Early Life[edit | edit source]
William Hague was born in Rotherham in Yorkshire. He initially boarded at Ripon Grammar School and then attended Wath-upon-Dearne Comprehensive, a state secondary school near Rotherham, previously Wath Grammar School. Wllm's father, Nigel, and mother ran a soft drinks manufacturing business for which he used to work during school holidays.
He studied PPE at Magdalen College, Oxford, graduating with First-Class Honours. He was President of the Oxford University Conservative Association (OUCA), but was "convicted of electoral malpractice" in the process which is even funnier given that he stood for the leadership on a platform of cleaning up the OUCA. He was elected President of the Oxford Union. Following university, Hague went on to study for a Master of Business Administration degree at INSEAD.
Pre-political Career[edit | edit source]
He then worked as a management consultant at McKinsey & Company.
Early Political Career[edit | edit source]
William's political career began early when in 1977 at the age of 16 he addressed the Conservative Party conference.
He stood unsuccessfully for Wentworth in 1987, but won his seat in a 1989 by-election. He became the youngest Conservative MP at the time.
Parliamentary Career[edit | edit source]
A year after getting elected William was appointed Parliamentary Private Secretary to the Chancellor of the Exchequer Norman Lamont. After Lamont was sacked in 1993, William moved to the Department of Social Security (DSS) where he was Parliamentary Under-Secretary of State. The following year he was promoted to Minister of State at the DSS with responsibility for Social Security and Disabled People. His fast rise up through the government was attributed to his intelligence and debating skills and absolutely not linked to the old boys network at Oxford or anything.
He entered the Cabinet in 1995 as Secretary of State for Wales. He continued serving in the Cabinet until the Conservatives were removed from power in the 1997 general election.
Leader of the Opposition[edit | edit source]
[The Conservatives] have elected a foetus as the party leader.~ Tony Banks
The Tories lost the 1997 general election very badly and William was subsequently elected as the party leader. Believing that the reason the party lost is because they were completely out of touch with the general public, William spend a quater of a million pounds on a "listening exercise" to find out why people hated the Tories. This went as well as you would expect.
In order to try and seem like a "normal person" he went to a theme park with the local MP. No one was impressed and William has never been allowed to forget this stupid stunt. He also claimed that when he was at university he could drink "14 pints a night". Not only did no one believe it, but no one really cared. It was this sort of posturing that resulted in 70% of people polled by The Telegraph believing that Hague would "say almost anything to win votes" with 66% of people polled agreeing that he comes over as "a bit of a wally"[1]
Despite this, William and the Tories did have some electoral success under this leadership. In the European parliament election in June 1999, the Tories gained 36 MEPs next to Labour's 29. This is generally accepted to be due to the Tories stance against joining the Euro and so William, in his infinite wisdom, decided that if they were really mean about Europe, people would flock back to the Conservative Party straight away.
Then Michael Portillo returned to parliament. Portillo was seen as softer and more center-ground than Hague and swiftly turned much of the Conservative Party against the then leader. William spent a lot of time trying to out-flank Portillo rather than then Prime Minister Blair which didn't really help him seem like a statesman in waiting.
The Tories gained one extra seat at the general election in 2001 and Hague's leadership was generally deemed a failure. At Labour's victory party they unfurled a banner saying "Congratulations Agent Hague: Mission Accomplished". Politics is a cruel, cruel world and William resigned as leader shortly afterwards.
Back on the Backbenches[edit | edit source]
Hague returned to the backbenches for the whole of the 2001 parliament. While there he wrote some books on political history, taught himself how to play the piano and generally kept his head down.
Shadow Cabinet[edit | edit source]
Following the 2005 general election Michael Howard offered Hague the post of Shadow Chancellor but William declined the role. The subsequent Tory leadership election saw David Cameron become leader of the party. William took the post of Shadow Foreign Secretary. He stood in for Cameron when he went on paternity leave and was generally much better at being leader as a stand in than he ever was as actual leader.
Foreign Secretary[edit | edit source]
When the coalition government was formed after the 2010 general election, Hague was appointed Foreign Secretary.
William was generally a good Foreign Secretary, although he did once claim Muammar Gaddafi was hiding in Venezuela when in fact he was lying in plain sight in the middle of a road in Sirte, Lybia, riddled with bullets.
During his time in the role he formed a close friendship with Angelina Jolie who is UN Ambassador and a prominent campaigner against violence against women and girls in war-zones. They worked together on a number of initiatives together on very serious matters. This won William a lot of praise both in fandom and the real world. It also lead to a huge number of photos of the two of them together trying to save the world.
In fact, it was Jolie who "inspired" him to step down from frontline politics in order to better focus on their shared campaign. This resulted in stories about William stepping down to "spend more time with Angelina Jolie".
Leader of the House of Commons[edit | edit source]
William announced that he would not stand for election again and subsequently took a much more low-profile role in the government when Cameron had a reshuffle. William became Leader of the House of Commons. He was witty and about to retire and the post seems vitting for a grandee. Then he went and ruined it by heading up the Conservative Party's failed plan to oust John Bercow as Speaker on the final day of the 2010 parliament. He left the Commons disgraced. Well, sounds judgement never really was one of his strong points.
"Retirement"[edit | edit source]
William disappeared for a while after the 2015 general election. It was widely assumed that he was probably happy staying out of things since his last act in parliament up to that point had tarnished the positive reputation he'd managed to grow while in government. It was announced in the dissolution honours list that Hague was actually being sent to the House of Lords as one of Cameron's new Tory peers[2].
| Full List of Appointments |
|---|
| • Minister of State for the Disabled (20 July, 1994 - 5 July, 1995) |
| • Secretary of State for Wales (5 July, 1995 - 2 May, 1997) |
| • Shadow Secretary of State for Wales (2 May, 1997 - 19 June, 1997) |
| • Leader of the Conservative Party (19 June, 1997 - 13 September, 2001) |
| • Leader of the Opposition (19 June, 1997 - 13 September, 2001) |
| • Shadow Foreign Secretary (6 December, 2005 - 11 May, 2010) |
| • Foreign Secretary (12 May, 2010 - 14 July, 2014) |
| • First Secretary of State (12 May, 2010 - present) |
| • Leader of the House of Commons (15 July, 2014 - 7 May 2015) |
Personal Life[edit | edit source]
After his predecessor John Redwood humiliated himself by incompetently mouthing the words of the Welsh National Anthem at a Tory conference, William decided he'd better learn the damn thing and asked his Welsh-speaking principal private secretary to teach it to him. Two years later they were married.
Sexuality[edit | edit source]
William once shared a hotel room with a male aide, sending the tabloids into paroxysms of prurient speculation. While it's always possible they were having an illicit gay affair, given that William is a proud Yorkshireman it seems rather more likely he was just too cheap to pay for two rooms.
Appearance[edit | edit source]
William's baldness has often been commented upon both in the media and in fandom. Most people are not fond of it, but pictures of him with hair when he was young have not been met with universal praise either. He is and shall most likely remain the subject of bald-jokes for quite a long time.
From the fandom's point of view, his major asset is his voice, described by one lolitician as "stunning and liquid amber-like".
Portrayal[edit | edit source]
In the Media[edit | edit source]
During his time as leader he was very unfavorably compared to Tony Blair. In the latter part of his career, however, he has managed to build a reputation for statesmanship (until the Speakership coup attempt) and the press and media were generally favourable towards him.
He also appeared on Have I Got News For You a number of times which generally added to the media's favourable opinion of him[3].
In Fanon[edit | edit source]
Fandom has concluded William is fluent in txt speak:
Translation for DCam and other Blackberry-savvy readers:
William Hague is Foreign Secretary for David Cameron's coalition government. Hague is very good at text speak and doesn't use his Blackberry clearly, which DCam doesn't appreciate.
Meme[edit | edit source]
Shipping[edit | edit source]
William is most commonly shipped with his worshipful junior minister Jeremy Browne.
He is also possibly infatuated with Nick Clegg , and apparently participates in a "double-act" with him.
References[edit | edit source]
- ↑ http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/talking_politics/1162569.stm
- ↑ http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-34072201
- ↑ See YouTube links here and here for some examples of his work
