David Miliband

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David Miliband

David Miliband.Portrait.jpg

Name David Wright Miliband (born 15 July, 1965)
Nicknames Mili-D (some Labourites), DMil (fandom)
Politics
Party Labour
Constituency South Shields (2001 - 15 April, 2013)
Positions • Secretary of State for Foreign and Commonwealth Affairs (2007-2010)
• Secretary of State for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs (2006-2007)
• Cabinet Minister for Communities and Local Government (2005-2006)
Likes Anthony Crossland, bananas, gangsta rap
Dislikes ?
Friends Tony Blair, Ben Bradshaw, Douglas Alexander, Hillary Clinton, Dan Hodges
Enemies Ed Miliband
Relationships
Partners Louise Shackelton
Children Isaac Miliband (2004), Jacob Miliband (2007)
Personal Attributes
Nationality English
Religion Atheist
Sexuality Straight
Height 6'
Eye Colour Brown
Handedness Right
Accent North London

David Miliband was the Foreign Secretary at the tail end of the last Labour Government, and a longtime SPAD/acolyte/coffee boy to Tony Blair. After his younger brother Ed Miliband narrowly defeated him in the 2010 Labour leadership contest, he flounced off to America to join the Thunderbirds.

Life and Career[edit | edit source]

Early Life[edit | edit source]

Pre-political Career[edit | edit source]

Early Political Career[edit | edit source]

Parliamentary Career[edit | edit source]

Full List of Appointments
• Cabinet Minister for Communities and Local Government (2005-2006)
• Secretary of State for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs (2006-2007)
• Secretary of State for Foreign and Commonwealth Affairs (2007-2010)
• Shadow Foreign Secretary (2010)

Personal Life[edit | edit source]

Outside of work David enjoys 'gangsta' rap, getting down with his bitches and hos, and a worryingly obsessive relationship with certain fruits. His favourite meal, however, is fish or sausages.

Striding off into the sunset

David has two sons, both of whom he is training in the ancient art of swan punching. He has generously offered to take in his brother's children in order to further their education in this area. His most recent attack was justified with the claim that 'the swan was asking for it' since it stole his delicious Marks and Spencers' coronation chicken sandwich. Fair enough, then.

There is evidence to suggest that David has not always been as fly. At university David was likened to Donny Osmond, and briefly 'courted' Ruth Kelly. He was often to be seen in the college bar with a pint of orange juice and a Mars bar, and tended to be tucked up in bed by 10 pm. Today he prefers a Twirl.

It is rumoured that David holds a grudge against his successor as Foreign Secretary, William Hague. This is widely believed to be linked to the special relationship Hague is forming with David's former top bitchola, Hillary Clinton.

David, some commentators complain, has fallen into the habit of answering the question he would have liked to have been asked, as opposed to the question he actually was. Loliticians are somewhat ambivalent on the issue, particularly when it produces quotes as lulzworthy as this.

Sexuality/Appearance/Ideology[edit | edit source]

Portrayal[edit | edit source]

In the Media[edit | edit source]

In Culture[edit | edit source]

In Fanon[edit | edit source]

Meme[edit | edit source]