Glossary

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The Lolitics fandom uses a number of specialized terms and phrases, some derived from fandon memes, others from RL politics. Here is a guide for the perplexed. (Acronyms can be found in the table at the bottom of the page.)

Backbenchers - MPs with no role in their party's official hierarchy

Ceiling Dolphin - A friendly cetacean who selflessly gives her time to entertain MPs during dull debates (see also Invisible Fairies)

Clegg Blocking - The camera angles in the House of Commons are such that the person standing at the despatch box on the Government side tends to block the camera's view of the person sitting to their immediate left. Sadly for loliticians, at PMQs this person is frequently Nick Clegg.

Crack Week - A common and accurate description of This Week

Despatch Box/Dispatch Box - the wooden box on the Table of the House of Commons which frontbenchers use as a lectern

Deploy the Clegg - A political strategy often embraced by the Conservatives when they needed to announce an unpopular policy during the coalition government of 2010 - 2015. Sometimes known to backfire, as in the 2013 Syria debate.

Digital Bennites - like the old skool Bennites, but with the power of the interwebs behind them. Generally found making gifs and collages on Tumblr.

Filibuster Friday - a Friday in which MPs try to pass Private Members Bills and the CBCJS try to stop them by talking until the time runs out

Fill - A fic written in response to someone else's prompt on the meme

Frontbenchers - MPs with formal government or opposition roles, ie. ministers and their shadows

He Died, Jeremy, He Tragically Died - a phrase originally coined by David Miliband to describe the death of Anthony Crosland. It instantly became a meme, and is now most commonly found in the form *tragically ded*, to describe a lolitician who has been slain by hotness, lulz, etc.

The House - an abbreviation MPs, and therefore loliticians, sometimes use for the House of Commons

In Bed with an Ardent Europhile - David Cameron's description of his relationship with Nick Clegg.

Invisible Fairies - playful sprites that haunt the Commons Chamber and often distract George Osborne from listening to PMQs

Lolitician - a member of the Lolitics fandom

The Machine - An evil, magical supercomputer that Peter Mandelson made to influence British politics. Not to be confused with the party machines, which also influence British politics but in a much more boring way.

Middlebenchers - a fandom term for junior ministers and shadow ministers who have some rank but aren't important enough to be in the Cabinet or Shadow Cabinet

My Honourable Friend - MPs are not allowed to use the second person or refer to each other by name in Commons debates, so they refer to other members of their party or coalition as "My honourable friend". Loliticians sometimes adopt this phrase to refer to each other.

No Homo Space - In a futile attempt to conceal their love, Nutvies occasionally sit two or three feet apart on the empty backbench so no one will think they're together. David tends to undermine this effort by leaning so far over to talk to Phil that his head is practically in his lap, which looks much gayer than just sitting next to each other like normal people.

NuLab - New Labour

Nutvies Blocking - Other Tory backbenchers do not always understand the purpose of the No Homo Space, and are sometimes ill-mannered enough to plonk themselves down in the middle of it. Frequent offenders include Rob Halfon and Gavin Barwell, who fortunately have fucked off to higher office.

Next Gen - Labour the Next Generation, ie. the current Shadow Cabinet

Portillo Moment - When a high-profile politician loses their seat. The 2015 general election featured lots of these.

The Other Place - MPs aren't allowed to refer to the House of Lords by name, and therefore have to adopt this ridiculous circumlocution. Loliticians sometimes use it to refer to Loltiics forums they're not currently on, eg. ficcing_lolitic or the comm if they're posting on the meme.

Tinhat - Someone who believes their RPF shipping fanon is real. Don't be this person.

Tellers - The four MPs assigned to count a vote.

Whips' Questions- at PMQs each party's Whips' office prepares some questions containing the attack lines of the week, for backbenchers who are too dim to come up with their own. Although usually this just leads to the tedious parroting of buzzwords (see the Drinking Game), it becomes hilarious when a) someone loses the list of questions, it gets into the hands of the opposing party, and one of their MPs reads out the list while mocking it or b) the backbencher is too incompetent to read out the question properly.

Frequently Used Acronyms
Term Meaning
AFAIK As far as I know
BAMF Bad Ass Mother Fucker
CBCJS The Conservative Backbench Circle Jerk Society
DA "Different Anon", a way for an anonymous commenter to distinguish themselves from previous anonymous commenters in a conversation on the meme
DDA Different Different Anon
DPMQs Deputy Prime Minister's Questions
DNW Do Not Want
EVEL English Votes for English Laws
F_L ficcing_lolitic, the fandom anonmeme
FT Financial Times
GTFO Get The Fuck Out
HIGNFY Have I Got News For You
HoC House of Commons
IA I Agree
IC In character
IDK I Don't Know
IDEK I Don't Even Know, for situations that not only baffle you personally but defy mortal comprehension
IIRC If I Recall Correctly
IKR I Know Right?
ILH I Love Him/Her
ILU I Love You
IRL In Real Life (as opposed to in fanon)
LBR Let's Be Real (not, confusingly, an abbreviation for Labour)
MTE My Thoughts Exactly
MTW Mock The Week
NGL Not Gonna Lie
NuLab New Labour
OOC Out Of Character
OP Original poster, ie. the person who prompted a fic on the meme
OTP One True Pairing
OT3 One True Threesome
OT4 One True Foursome
PMQs Prime Minister's Questions
QT Question Time
RL Real Life (as opposed to fanon)
RPF Real Person Fanfiction
RPS Real Person Slash
STFU Shut The Fuck Up